Amsterdamned

 

"The canals are an ideal place to hide. You can go all around the city incognito."

Amsterdam is being terrorized by a mysterious scuba diving serial killer, who stalks his victims from the canals and detective Eric Visser (Huub Stapel) is on the case. Eric's investigation leads him to a local diving club, where he meets beautiful novice Laura (Monique van de Ven) and her friend and psychiatrist, Martin Ruysdael (Hidde Maas). The killer keeps striking - both in daylight and under cover of night - leaving a gruesome trail of corpses. With pressure from the Commissioner and his job on the line, can Eric find the killer in time?

Amsterdamned is a fascinating Dutch take on the giallo genre. Much like The Girl Who Knew Too Much, it's part murder mystery and part travelogue, showcasing an exciting European destination. We get to see historic canals and locks, quaint houseboats, beautiful old buildings on narrow streets and even a charming brass band. But we also get to see a bloody corpse hung from a bridge get smeared across the glass roof of a tour boat full of children. It's a fun, wild ride featuring two brilliant chase scenes - one on the streets and one through the canals, ending with a massive fireball. It's a highly entertaining, well-made film full of twists, suspense and humor but, unfortunately, it all falls apart in the last five minutes. The killer's identity, motivation and ultimate fate are a giant let-down, leaving the viewer desperately unsatisfied.

• The "paranormal" element in the checklist above comes from Eric's daughter's friend, who claims to have psychic powers.

• Dick Maas not only wrote and directed this movie, he also composed the score.

What the Hell Am I Watching?

This movie is full of crazy moments. After we're treated to the aforementioned reveal of the first victim, we're introduced to Detective Eric in the bath, when his daughter creeps in, aiming a loaded gun at him. 

There's a fun Nightmare on Elm Street homage where a woman is sunbathing on an inflatable raft in a canal when the killer swims up beneath her. His knife rips through the plastic right between her knees and the camera cuts away as we hear her scream.

Also, please note that in Holland, the giallo tropes are reversed and the color yellow indicated the heroes, not the villain.

Fashion Moment:

I really dig Martin's home office and its eclectic postmodern industrial aesthetic. This guy was Niles Crane five years before Niles Crane was even a thing.